9 Mistakes Men Make With Their Power to Choose

You have the Power to Choose, and that is a BIG DEAL!

I’ve heard it said that before you make a choice you have power over it, but once you make your choice, it has power over you. That’s a wise and sobering statement.

When you are making a plan, be sure to consider the suggestions in this post.

What are we talking about, Power to Choose?

As you know, in life you have many choices to make. In fact, at each stage in your life, you will face choices that will dramatically affect your future. Ultimately your power to choose is a gift from God when he gave you a free will.

In the end, your life will consist primarily of the results, from the choices you made. The success or failure that you experience will often be determined by how much you are reactive, versus how much you are proactive.

We are not talking about what you want for lunch, or choosing your next coffee latte. Although those choices daily can have lasting consequences too. What we are talking about, is your big life choices, and your power to choose.

For Example:

  • What age you choose to get married, and who you marry.
  • The course of education you pursue.
  • What career track you get on.
  • The way you respond to crisis in life.
  • What to do if you are in a desperate circumstance.
  • How you recover from bad mistakes.
  • What parenting methods you use.
  • How you handle money.
  • What church you take your family to.

As you can see, the Power to Choose is about your big life choices. These really do add up to a lot. Of course, choosing to serve the Lord is first and foremost!

9 Mistakes Men Make With Their Power to Choose (in no specific order)

Mistake #1: Not Considering All Options.

With every choice there are options. If there weren’t, then there would be no choice. Stating the obvious here is necessary because many men have their judgment clouded by their opinions, wants, desires, and preferences.

None of those things are bad in and of themselves until they stop you from considering all the options. Before you make a choice, take the time to consider your situation. Have you rated all the options and considered your plan? Don’t let your opinions cloud your judgment.

Mistake #2: Not Seeking Good Counsel.

This is an incredibly important point. Every biblical man ought to have at least three other men, that they look up to, as wise counselors. These should be mature Christian men, that have your best interests in mind.

Good counselors are those godly men in your life, that are willing to tell you what you don’t want to hear. Not because they are abrasive, but because they know you need to hear it.

Your pastor would be a great man to consider as a counselor. Give him a call and set up a time to meet with him. Maybe the leader of your men’s group at church, your father if he is a Christian, or some old-timer that loves the Lord and knows his Bible. Men like that are a treasure in your life.

Right now, think of three men in your life, that are like that to you. Make sure you get their cell phone number. Ask them for permission to call them when you need some advice.

Mistake #3: Not Willing to Wait for the Best.

Most men I know are impatient. Ask my wife and she will tell you that I need to work on that myself. So you are not alone if you struggle with patience.

However, along with many other men, I have learned the hard way, that God’s best is worth waiting for. Whatever the situation is that you are making a choice about, remember that God has a plan for it all. If your faith is being stretched then keep in mind, that it’s normal for God, to work that way in your life.

I can’t think of one man in the bible, that walked with God, whose faith wasn’t tested and stretched. If you are honestly pursuing biblical manhood in your life, and you are trying to walk with God, don’t expect to be the exception. Your faith will be tested too.

As a side note, “waiting on God’s best” is never an excuse for inaction. We cannot throw our hands up in the air and stop being responsible. Waiting on God’s best is a matter of putting off a choice, for another time. That is not to be confused with indecision. We will come back to that later.

Mistake #4: Not Praying For Wisdom.

Sometimes, in our ability to quickly size up situations and handle them ourselves, we rely solely on our own personal experience and intuition. Which is fine when it comes to small daily choices you have to make.

When it comes to big life-size choices, then it’s time to seek God in prayer for wisdom. Consider this following verse carefully, as your big life-size decisions may be in the balance.

James 1:5–6 “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him. But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.

This is a power-packed portion of scripture!

First, we all lack wisdom, none of us have it all down pat. Right?

Second, you will do well to remember that God alone is the source of all true wisdom. Right?

Third, you have to ask in faith.

This means that you are trusting God that he will give you the wisdom, discretion, prudence, discernment, and understanding that you need. If you don’t ask God in faith, for the wisdom that you need, the results can be catastrophic!

Like a wave that is driven by the wind, your circumstances will dictate to you, without any consideration for your life.

Praise God, that He is involved in the lives of his bible-believing blood-bought children! The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom.

Mistake #5: Not Being Willing To Put In The Work For the Win.

Laziness is the poor man’s vice! It is a hedge of thorns that will snare you and bleed you with a thousand cuts. There is no doubt that God blesses his hard-working children.

As biblical men, we should be counted in those ranks of men who outwork our counterparts at every turn. However, it is far too common for men to jump at the chance for a pot of fools’ gold.

Every scam is looking for a man who loves shortcuts around work. There never seems to be a shortage of slothful men, looking for a way to get rich quickly. Don’t be that guy. What does a REAL WIN look like? A real win will be 100% in line with God’s will.

It will be the right thing for you, your marriage, your family, and your church attendance. If any one of those things is compromised, then you are not getting the win. You are getting duped!

Be willing to put in the work for the win. Increase your skills, talents, and abilities. Push yourself if you have to. Don’t sell yourself short.

You don’t have to be the boss. You don’t even have to be in charge. But, you have to financially provide for your family, and be there for them, including faithfully attending church together. If a choice you make leads you away from that, it’s not a good choice.

Mistake #6: Not Helping Others Get A Win.

Selfish choices are never God-honoring. Every choice you make has consequences, and most of the time those consequences affect the ones you love most. 

If it’s a God-honoring decision, then they are affected in a positive way and blessed. If it is not, then they pay the price.

How many times have you heard the story of a boy whose father never came to his ball games because he had to work? Finally, that boy hits a home run and looks to the stands where his dad should be sitting.

Well, those boys become men eventually. Many times, they resent their dads. I know, I have counseled them.

With the tragedy of divorce on the rise within the Christian ranks, every last one of them can be boiled down to choices. What a sad state it is when men make selfish choices. Of course, you can only control yourself, and divorce is often the result of compounded choices by both.

You know from your own experience how true this is. So start engaging your life choices with the desire to win, and to help others get the win. Consider helping your wife, children, friends, family, pastor, and church, to get the win.

How can your choices help them get the win? Easy, by choosing to be there, and engaging them in their own lives. Choose, at every opportunity, to set them up for success!

Mistake #7: Being Too Indecisive.

There comes a time with every choice, that you have to choose. Not choosing, is a choice. It is the act of indecision that is irresponsible. Letting your life happen by default will never allow you to reach your God-given potential.

This article is all about helping you overcome the mistakes people make in their choices. We want to help you be that biblical man that God made you to be.

If you are a man that struggles with indecision, then we have a great article on that subject too, titled “4 Reasons You Can’t Make Up Your Mind.

Mistake #8: Letting Someone Choose For You.

There are times in life when you don’t get a choice. Your boss or authority just tells you what to do, and you do it. While that is the right thing to do, it can also condition you to let others choose for you.

Sometimes men lack the confidence to exercise their power to choose for themselves, and so they defer the decision to someone else.

That’s fine if you are trying to decide on what restaurant to have dinner at with your wife. But what about BIG decisions. That’s what this article is about.

This has happened to me personally. When counseling with someone facing a difficult choice in a hard situation, they say something like “just tell me what I should do, and I will do it””. But that is usually a copout.

What they are doing is deflecting responsibility for their choices. That way if things don’t work out, it’s my fault. Well, as biblical men we are to take responsibility for ourselves.

What you decide, is YOUR decision. You have to live with the outcome, so YOU choose. This leads to the last point…

Mistake #9: Not Considering The End Result.

When it comes to your power to choose, it’s important to learn how to think long-term. Consider the fact that God is a long-term thinker. He knows the end from the beginning and is always working on His unfolding plan to bring about the end result of His will.

You are created in the image of God. He created you with a will of your own, and the ability to choose and make decisions about your life. You can think and reason. He allowed you to chart the course of your life.

On top of that, God gave us the scriptures to lead us into a knowledge of Himself, and into a relationship with Him through Jesus Christ. What Jesus had to go through at Calvary, was all part of God’s long-term plan.

What choices you make today, will have a dramatic effect on your future. You have the Power to Choose! So, what kind of future do you want to have? Where do you see yourself in 20 years?

I know without a doubt, that God has a plan for your life. It would give me great pleasure to know, that you went after God’s plan with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. The key is to start now and take the biggest step that you can in the right direction.

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